Perth-WRX.com - Random Friday Arvo Funny

Shower Protocol 
 
How To Shower Like a Woman 
 
Take off clothes and place them sectioned in laundry  basket according to lights and darks. 
 
 Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. 
 
 If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed  areas. 
 
Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make  mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc. 
 
 Get in the shower. 
 
 Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah,  wide loofah and pumice stone. 
 
 Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo  with 43 added vitamins. 
 
 Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean. 
 
 Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner  enhanced. 
 
 Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for  10 minutes until red. 
 
 Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa  cake body wash. 
 
 Rinse conditioner off hair. 
 
Shave armpits and legs. 
 
 Turn off shower. 
 
 Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. 
 
 Spray mould spots with Tile cleaner. 
 
 Get out of shower. 
 
 Dry with towel the size of a small country. 
 
 Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. 
Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel  on head. 
 
 If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed  areas. 
 
 
How To Shower Like a Man 
 
 Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed  and leave them in a pile. 
 
Walk naked to the bathroom. 
 
 If you see wife along the way, shake willy at her  making the 'woo-woo' sound. 
 
 Look at your manly physique in the mirror. 
 
 Admire the size of your willy and scratch your bum. 
 
 Get in the shower. 
 
 Wash your face. 
 
 Wash your armpits. 
 
 Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse  them off. 
 
 Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. 
 
 Spend majority of time washing privates and  surrounding area. 
 
 Wash your bum, leaving those coarse bum hairs stuck on  the soap. 
 
 Wash your hair. 
 
 Make a Shampoo Mohawk. 
 
 Wee. 
 
 Rinse off and get out of shower. 
 
 Partially dry off. 
 
 Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was  hanging out of bath the whole time. 
 
 Admire willy size in mirror again. 
 
 Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and  fan on. 
 
 Return to bedroom with towel around waist. 
 
 If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake willy at her  and make the 'woo-woo' sound again. 
 
 Throw wet towel on bed. 
 
 
I KNOW YOU'RE LAUGHING CAUSE MOST OF IT'S TRUE!!!!!!