Hmm.. I thought as much ...
I've had it quickly diagnosed - The
ECU is totally fried. See comments for Autoguy.
Checked Engine, Found water in cylinders, dried out, still no start, found no spark or diagnostic codes. Check
ECU unit, All wet. Tested compressions (125, 75, 70 and 100PSI) - Low compressions. suspect bent conrods.
Looks like the WRX is going to the sky now.