So I had the misfortune of finding some complete fucking retarded girls wallet with numerous bank cards, student cards and around $180 in cash. So thought I'd be a bit clever and see if she was on Facebook, bingo! Only one for Perth, so sent her a message telling her I'd found her wallet. And this is the email thread:


April 8 at 5:08pm
Hi Teagan, not sure if this is the right person, but I found your wallet on Clarkson Avenue. I live in Tapping if you want to pick it up.

Jaimie

Teagan
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April 9 at 2:27pm
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oh ok thenn shitt


Teagan
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April 10 at 5:35pm
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yeahh its me wallet and i kinda need it bak aye... so how can i get it frm u???

Jaimie
April 11 at 7:36am
hey, I'm in tapping u can pick it from me or I can post it to u.

Teagan
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April 11 at 10:15am
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urmm ok thenn....


Jaimie
April 11 at 11:20pm
I'll post it to u on tuesday when I get back to work. That Ok? Whats your address?

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Teagan
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Today at 3:54pm
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urmmm ok thenn "
yeahh i kinda need it. when ya sendin it

Jaimie
Today at 6:57pm
Well where should I post it too?? I'm really busy. Just remember I'm doing you a favour. I could quite easily have just chucked it in the bin. Show a bit of appreciation.

Jaimie
Today at 7:55pm
Just get your parents to contact me, I will deal with them instead.

Teagan
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Today at 9:55pm
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yeahh im glad that ur not chukin it nd all....


Jaimie
Today at 9:59pm
How do I post it to you? I don't have your address? I can send it to Joondalup Police station and you pick it up from there if you prefer.

Teagan
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Today at 10:04pm
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urmmm r u close to st.stephens??

Jaimie
Today at 10:08pm
not really

Teagan
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Today at 10:13pm
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ok thenn
urmmm u cant tlk to me mum coz she drunk off her face....
wat side st.stephens u on???

Jaimie
Today at 10:15pm
What do you want me to do with your wallet? It has $180 in it. Do you actually want it back? If so provide me with an address so I can send it to you or I can send it to Joondalup Police Station and you pick it from there.

Teagan
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Today at 10:18pm
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Do that cunt an ill get some1 to sort u out ay.wots yr number


Jaimie
Today at 10:21pm

I'm not sure if you really get what I'm saying. I found your wallet. It has lots of money in it. What the fuck do you want me to do with it!? Don't you want it. It has all your student cards, bank cards etc etc.


Teagan
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Today at 10:28pm
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Are you fuckin slow. I sed send it tp me.