Miles & miles of open roads with no real speed limits - stuck doing 100 on a hire bike and the STI is nearly 6000km away.....

People that don't indicate properly on roundabouts, it's left to exit yet they just keep their right indicator on and you sit there thinking they passing! Sooo annoying.

[QUOTE=fatboy;788975]Ringlands[/QUOTE]

ping ping ping :(

[QUOTE=Yorkie;789026]People that don't indicate at roundabouts[/QUOTE]

***FIXED for more Perth-Spec accuracy.

The wanker in the ute who is always in front of me on the drive to work and will not go above 70 kph on the Guildford Road Tonkin Highway on ramp. No matter what time I leave he is always in front of me.

Last one:

The wankers that attempt to turn right onto Main Street from Hutton street every single morning and force everyone going straight into the left. It's always one or two people right and 100's in the left. Stupid!

Entire traffic flow suffers.

Ok ranting over.

My shithole place of work.

No idea how I am supposed to manage a workforce when it is full of hot headed fuckwits that all want to be the chief and bicker and boss each other around like tomorrow and then get on the phone to their favourite supervisor when it doesn't go their way. Who then ring me and bitch in my ear about how their side of the workforce is working too hard and the other isn't pulling it's weight etc etc when they're all just full of shit. I see exactly what is going on.

You would think a bunch of people all over 25 would be able to man up and behave like adults. I'd have less drama dealing with school kids I bet. Over it today.

/Rant

I have today and tomorrow off as I am Best Man for my mate's wedding on Saturday. The missus also has today off and decided to come to the city with me for a 10:30am final fitting and pick up of the suit.

I wanted to get into the city at 9am in order to purchase some new shoes and grab some work clothes while Myer has their tightarse specials on. She decides she wants to cook bacon, sausages, eggs, tomatoes and toast. No, I don't want it. Breakfast rarely agrees with my stomach and it's 8:30am. I want to leave. Doesn't listen, cooks breakfast, I eat, feel sick, farting like a trooper, eggs are going straight through me and I feel the need to drop a Mr Whippy textured shit within 20 minutes. FFS.

Get into town just before 10am, I now have 30 minutes shopping time. Thanks a bunch kitchen bitch. I'm pissed off, unwell, not concentrating, combined with stupidly fucking high box curbs in tight multi-storey carparks I manage to scrape 3, yes 3 of my rims. Now I'm really raging internally.

Oh, I need to shit again. Awesome. Find toilet in David Jones, waste more precious time playing upside down volcano. Then go to Tony Barlow to pick up my suit. Oh, you can't find it? ARRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!$@$~@!$!@ (manager ends up finding it after 10 minutes and a fucking heart attack from the groom and myself).

Already stressed as hell just having to write a fucking speech with the expectation of being "funny". The only thing is I'm not allowed to be a cunt. Or use stereotypes. Or say racist jokes (he's Anglo-Iindian). Or anything sexist. YOU'VE TAKEN AWAY ALL MY MATERIAL YOU PRICK!

Today can eat a bag of moist cocks.

[QUOTE=TROLLEY;790210]Thanks a bunch kitchen bitch.[/QUOTE]

Very entertaining read :P Hope the day gets better

[QUOTE=TROLLEY;790210] YOU'VE TAKEN AWAY ALL MY MATERIAL YOU PRICK!
[/QUOTE]

Just use that exact post as your speech.

Just cut and paste from this. [URL="http://www.thebestmanspeech.com/"]http://www.thebestmanspeech.com/[/URL]

[QUOTE=RichX;790220]Just use that exact post as your speech.[/QUOTE]

I have actually paraphrased and put it into the speech so that if my speech seems too soft, he will cop the blame.

Day gets even better - the fiancee rings up her hairdresser and asks if they can squeeze me in for a quick trim while she gets her hair done this afternoon. Yep, cool no worries. Awesome. Printed out a couple of man-model photos with "scruffy" hair, asked for similar (shit easy, I usually do my own hair with a razor comb). Ended up getting the apprentice hairdresser who removes twice as much hair as desired and basically gave me a french crop. Now I look like a fucking chav for the wedding. Just need to put my earings back in and find the Adidas jump suit I used to wear in the late 90's.

:icon_butt

Lol who'd you f*ck over for all the bad luck ..

hah, they're all pretty lame things let's be honest. Just being a little bitch today and having a whine. I'm stressed.

[I]in b4 "today only?"[/I]

Only today?

I'm disappointed in you ... do the job properly and go scrape the last rim.

[COLOR="LightBlue"]*Books flight to leave Perth ... on phone can't reply*[/COLOR]

you had me at....I feel the need to drop a Mr Whippy textured shit within 20 minutes :D:eek::eek::eek::eek:

[QUOTE=TROLLEY;790210]I have today and tomorrow off as I am Best Man for my mate's wedding on Saturday. The missus also has today off and decided to come to the city with me for a 10:30am final fitting and pick up of the suit.

I wanted to get into the city at 9am in order to purchase some new shoes and grab some work clothes while Myer has their tightarse specials on. She decides she wants to cook bacon, sausages, eggs, tomatoes and toast. No, I don't want it. Breakfast rarely agrees with my stomach and it's 8:30am. I want to leave. Doesn't listen, cooks breakfast, I eat, feel sick, farting like a trooper, eggs are going straight through me and I feel the need to drop a Mr Whippy textured shit within 20 minutes. FFS.

Get into town just before 10am, I now have 30 minutes shopping time. Thanks a bunch kitchen bitch. I'm pissed off, unwell, not concentrating, combined with stupidly fucking high box curbs in tight multi-storey carparks I manage to scrape 3, yes 3 of my rims. Now I'm really raging internally.

Oh, I need to shit again. Awesome. Find toilet in David Jones, waste more precious time playing upside down volcano. Then go to Tony Barlow to pick up my suit. Oh, you can't find it? ARRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!$@$~@!$!@ (manager ends up finding it after 10 minutes and a fucking heart attack from the groom and myself).

Already stressed as hell just having to write a fucking speech with the expectation of being "funny". The only thing is I'm not allowed to be a cunt. Or use stereotypes. Or say racist jokes (he's Anglo-Iindian). Or anything sexist. YOU'VE TAKEN AWAY ALL MY MATERIAL YOU PRICK!

Today can eat a bag of moist cocks.[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=TROLLEY;790225]I have actually paraphrased and put it into the speech so that if my speech seems too soft, he will cop the blame.

Day gets even better - the fiancee rings up her hairdresser and asks if they can squeeze me in for a quick trim while she gets her hair done this afternoon. Yep, cool no worries. Awesome. Printed out a couple of man-model photos with "scruffy" hair, asked for similar (shit easy, I usually do my own hair with a razor comb). Ended up getting the apprentice hairdresser who removes twice as much hair as desired and basically gave me a french crop. Now I look like a fucking chav for the wedding. Just need to put my earings back in and find the Adidas jump suit I used to wear in the late 90's.

:icon_butt[/QUOTE]

pics of fucked hair cut not loading :p

No photos. Face for radio.

could be worse
[IMG]http://cdn.crushable.com/files/2011/09/jason_statham_8917209831.jpg[/IMG]

[QUOTE=Strubaru;790243]could be worse
[IMG]http://cdn.crushable.com/files/2011/09/jason_statham_8917209831.jpg[/IMG][/QUOTE]

Yeah but when you can use any household / everyday item(s) to incapacitate someone you can looks how you like :rolleyes:

People who don't do the speed limit.

Shitty intercooler pipes.

Taxi drivers who toot their horn at 3.40am in the morning are you ducking serious ? Then precedes to slam the boot and his door.

Taxi Drivers fullstop.

Middle of the night stomach cramps like your a f****** pregnant woman , finally running to the toilet and laying a house brick then waking up feeling like its the morning after your first night in prison locked in a cell with bubba . But that thick cut fillet tasted frickkin awesome maybe ill chew it more next time rather than inhaling it :eek::eek::eek::D

I don't even want to ask how you know what it feels like to wake up after a night with bubba in a prison cell.

[QUOTE=JRecardo;790324]I don't even want to ask how you know what it feels like to wake up after a night with bubba in a prison cell.[/QUOTE]

:eek: lol

Car not starting when you are in a hurry to get to work -.-

The amount of Perth drivers that think indicators are an optional extra....it does my fkin head in :mad:

The amount of Perth drivers who think cyclists are optional... fuck there are some nasty cunts on our roads these days.

I have zero problems with cyclists as long as they ride in single file.

[QUOTE=forde;791051]I have zero problems with cyclists as long as they ride in single file.[/QUOTE]

Agreed, also the amount if times i see them running a red light is stupid. I almost cleaned one up today who ran a red straight across 2 lanes. I had a truck in the right hand lane and i was in the left i saw the green light and took off, then out of no where this cyclist rides straight in front of me and i have to hit the skids so i dont to hit the dumbass


using the Perth-WRX mobile app

[QUOTE=nick73;791046]The amount of Perth drivers who think cyclists are optional... fuck there is some nasty cunts on our roads these days.[/QUOTE]

When they pay to register their bike on the road, just as I do for all of my vehicles, not just one, then they'll have a place on the roadways.

I would gladly pay a fee to use the roads, if it meant people would stop swerving at me in the cycling lane, throwing rubbish at me, swearing and hurling abuse at me, chopping me at intersections when I am clearly entering it before them.

I always ride alone and stick to the lane if provided, basically I try to do the right thing because I am not interested in deliberately aggravating people driving behind me at 80km/hr. Plus cyclists are able to be fined just as any other road user running red lights etc.

Maybe some drivers don't like it that I can hold 40km/hr on the flat with a mountain bike while they suck fumes and sms and facefuck one another on their smart phones in peak hour pile up.

Perhaps you consider yourself to be a fairly car conscious peddler, and that's fine, but the same way that you call out motorists as cunteyes, there are just as many arrogant fucks on push bikes. Whether you would be willing to pay to use the roads or not, until cyclists do, they really don't belong on it. It's by no means a personal attack towards you or any one individual, but, and I'm being fairly stereotypical, nearly every cyclist who's appeared on A Current Affair, the news, etc etc, has gone on about their 'right' to be there.

[QUOTE=astralex;791060]Perhaps you consider yourself to be a fairly car conscious peddler, and that's fine, but the same way that you call out motorists as cunteyes, there are just as many arrogant fucks on push bikes. Whether you would be willing to pay to use the roads or not, until cyclists do, they really don't belong on it. It's by no means a personal attack towards you or any one individual, but, and I'm being fairly stereotypical, nearly every cyclist who's appeared on A Current Affair, the news, etc etc, has gone on about their 'right' to be there.[/QUOTE]

That post is utterly brilliant. I don't think it could be said any better

I find it funny when people in a Getz come up to a cyclist and suddenly think they're driving an Abrams... Swerve into the next suburb to get around them it's a joke

^^I guess that means pedestrians don't have a right to cross the road either...

I only have a problem with drivers who are deliberately targeting me as I described. I've been riding on Perth roads for over 20 years, times have changed, people are not as tolerant as they used to be.

[QUOTE=nick73;791068]^^I guess that means pedestrians don't have a right to cross the road either...[/QUOTE]

Really?

[QUOTE=nick73;791068]^^I guess that means pedestrians don't have a right to cross the road either...
[/QUOTE]

They have the right to cross in designated areas, and have to wait and allow traffic to pass in 95% of the others.

[QUOTE=Sharpy.au;791063]
I find it funny when people in a Getz come up to a cyclist and suddenly think they're driving an Abrams... Swerve into the next suburb to get around them it's a joke[/QUOTE]

Yeah, it sucks a bit during peak hour. I generally stick to my lane, which gives them about 30cm of breathing space which seems acceptable to keep the traffic moving in both lanes.

[QUOTE=nick73;791057]Plus cyclists are able to be fined just as any other road user running red lights etc.
[/QUOTE]

I have seen cyclists chop up a red light a bit lately, if they want to be on the road like a vehicle, stick to the rules like the rest of the traffic on it.

Pretty poor form i always thought to myself.

Richard,
Fuck up and fix the net at the office already. I don't want to hear your IT bullshitnexcuse of Telstra & their 15 vans parked all over mounts bay rd!!

Fuck creatures off & do something.. Ohhh and I think it's you, Lisa's been very nice today...

The end.

Alcohol, why you not so nice the morning after.

[QUOTE=DukeDrifter;791800]Alcohol, why you not so nice the morning after.[/QUOTE]
... Because you didn't start drinking again early enough?